I won’t miss this, but I will miss them.
I won’t miss the constant disaster in my house. I won’t miss sticky counters and floors, the “What’s that smell” and the worst, “Why is this wet?!”
But I will miss the evidence of their little lives all around me. Right now, any place in my home, all I have to do is open my eyes and I can see my kids, even when they aren’t there. Their toys, their school work, their favorite things–they’re everywhere.
I won’t miss the sleep deprivation and the constant night-waking. I won’t miss the complete exhaustion that even the rare good night’s sleep can’t fix.
But I will miss all of us sleeping under the same roof. I will miss knowing that all my little loves are tucked safely in their beds where I left them. I will miss a stroke of their hair or a kiss of their sleeping cheeks being just a few steps away.
I won’t miss the noise. Our house is so loud, most days feel like an all-out physical assault on my senses.
But I will miss the life brimming in this place. There is so much excitement in those little voices, so much joy in those ear-piercing shrieks. Right now, life is spilling out of every crevice of our home.
I won’t miss the crying and the whining. I won’t miss feeling like hearing my name one more time might make my chest explode.
But I will miss being the center of their world. I will miss knowing what they did all day and who they are spending their time with. I will miss being the one they come to with every problem.
I won’t miss “playing pretend” or playing things like Pokemon. I just won’t.
But I will miss them wanting to play with me. I will miss being their top choice. I will miss being their #1 (or at least their #2, because Dad is pretty much a celebrity around here).
I won’t miss the fighting. My kids bicker about any and everything. I don’t believe there’s a thing on this planet they can’t argue about.
But I will miss the adorable sibling conversations. I will miss seeing them growing together and loving one another. I will miss their unprompted acts of kindness toward one another that melt my heart on the spot.
I won’t miss the constant chatter. It seems like every other sentence right now is “Watch this” or “Right, Mom?” I can’t even use the bathroom without people following me there to continue our conversation.
But I will miss them wanting to talk to me. I will miss them caring what I think about everything they do. I will miss them wanting my attention more than anything else. I will miss full-on, professorial discussions from tiny voices about superheroes, Star Wars, and whether a bird flies faster than a plane or a rocket ship.
In short, I definitely won’t miss all of this, but I will most certainly miss all of them.